worn out, tired, dragged down. but elta's here.

dear booey,

daddy had a fever on saturday night. we had to go to the emergency room. i got you out of bed around 12:30 am. kast met us at the hospital, took you home, and put you back to bed.

i stayed up all night with daddy at the hospital. he had a ct scan that showed a large abscess near his liver and another one near his pancreas. he was admitted to the hospital and today he had the abscesses drained. it was a very painful procedure, but he is on the mend.

i have been unbearably tired after staying up all night in the emergency room and then coming home to you just when you woke up. after feeding you and getting your cousin teja to come over and stay with you, i went right back to the hospital.

last night i was hoping for solid sleep, but you woke up crying three times. it was hard for you to be woken up in the middle of the night and go home with kast. all night long you called for mama in your sleep. then when i left the next morning again you took it hard. so you needed some extra mommy time. when you woke up crying last night i was too tired to think or even look at the clock, so i just nursed you each time whether you needed it or night. it only occurred to me afterward that i could have just calmed you and gone back to bed.

you are in the middle of a big growth spurt. pulling yourself up, eating a ton, and sleeping hard. you have started taking some formula each day, which is a good insurance policy amidst all this chaos. now i can stop worrying about making enough milk for you. especially if i can't pump enough some days.

your auntie elta is visiting for the week. she is helpful in every way. she makes you smile and laugh. and she vacuums, too.